Tuesday, July 23, 2013

The Lecture Garner Ted Armstrong Should Have Made

From Ambassador Report 52:
Some of us can remember a Garner Ted in the seventies who, as a former navy man with a naked girl tatoo, would casually tell dirty jokes while guzzling beer and playing cards after basketball games at Ambassador, and who wondered aloud about how a masculine Jesus could ever possibly have had anything other than normal sexual urges. We are supposed to believe now, however, that the new GTA is a much more sensitive individual. GTA now even offers a cassette sermon entitled "How to Have a Happy Marriage." Actually, the lecture many have been waiting to hear is, "How I Screwed Around and Still Kept My Wife, Family, and Ministerial Credentials." (Ted: No kidding. As a book it would be a major best-seller. Think about it.)

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